Two Questions You Should Stop Asking Women

and people, in general.



I don’t hate many things. I rarely get annoyed. But I’ll be damned if one more person asks me one of the following two questions.


How are you still single?




How are you broke?


Let’s review.


How are you still single?


I feel fine about my relationship status. I’m almost ambivalent. I mean, I’m not excited that I’m single. I’m really not. I want to get married & have kids and puppies running around the house. But I’m not in a constant state of worry or concern about it. Most of the time.


Some days, I love single life. Independence. The freedom to make my schedule without having to consider anyone else. Other days, I kind of want to poke my eye out when I see your engagement & wedding photos on Facebook.


When I go watch the sunset, by myself, & see couples on blankets gazing at the ocean and being all lovey, I’ll be honest… sometimes I think it’s cute. Occasionally I want to cry. Most of the time, it’s whatever. When I go home for the holidays, alone, again… as usual… yes, I do think it would be nice to have someone to share it with. Mainly so my family will stop telling me that I’m “going to be single forever” if I don’t stop being so picky & that my nephew needs cousins.


I understand that most often, you are asking me in that sort of “you’re so awesome, how are you still single?” way. But it’s gut wrenching on occasion. The answer is this: If I knew how I was single, I probably wouldn’t be. So maybe, please, just stop bringing it up. I’m fully aware of my current relationship status without you asking me how it is that way. Moving on.


Cabo Silleiro
Cabo Silleiro (Photo credit: FreeCat)


How are you broke?


How am I broke? This one makes me cringe but I imagine I’m not the only person in her late 20s that has had to turn a few things down because I couldn’t afford to take that last minute trip to Cabo (or, shit, rent a paddleboard for an hour).


I really don’t think you understand that when you say to someone “how are you broke?” you sound like a jaggoff (yinzer).


I rarely tell people I’m broke. Because I’m not. I have change laying around in my car, my desk, my sock drawer, & about 15 other random places.


We are so wealthy in America that most of us don’t even know where all of our money is. Truth.


So ‘broke’ is certainly an exaggeration. But occasionally, paycheck to paycheck is reality for a few weeks or months. And if I let those little words slip… please… dear God… don’t degrade me by asking me HOW. I’ve been working my tail off since I was 16 years old. I can assure you it’s not because I’m coasting. It may, however, mean one of the following:


  • I don’t want to spend ‘x’ amount of money on ‘y’. I also don’t want to explain my reason. It’s easier just to tell you I’m broke.
  • I’m currently investing in myself. Personal development seminars & courses. Books. That sort of thing. I understand that to many people, this sounds bizarre, so when we are out with friends & it’s loud & you’re drinking, the last thing I want to do is explain to you why I think this is important.
  • A lot of shit happened this year. Car stuff. Medical stuff. Stuff that was unplanned. Not sure about you, but my “shit happens” fund isn’t for spending on vacations. That fund is still being replenished from the Vegas trip we took in 2007.

    Cabo Home
    Cabo Home (Photo credit: FreeCat)
  • I voluntarily took a paycut in 2013. I quit a well-paying second income because I wasn’t passionate about it to pursue a passion that paid me 12 grand less this year. I’m happier, regardless, even if I am more broke.


I realize I tell you I’m working pretty often. Most of this is researching, learning, growing, & otherwise hustling so that one day, I’ll never have to turn you down. Because I promise I really do want to go to Cabo with you on a random weekend, just because.


And when we do, I won’t be broke.


I may or may not be single.


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One thought on “Two Questions You Should Stop Asking Women”

  1. Greatest post I have read in a long time. Remember, “Why are you single?” — “I’m single because I haven’t found someone who is equally as awesome as I am.” xo

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